EPISODE 11: Loss and its Impact On Extended Family & Friendships

Episode 11: Loss and its Impact On Extended Family and Friendships

Hey listeners, welcome to Episode 11 of The When Life Stops podcast, a show where we talk about all this loss, grief and recovery and our aim is to equip you so you can move forward and find new meaning to life.

On this episode, we dive into the impact of loss and its impact on extended family and friendships. 

We share our experiences of the impact our losses had on our extended families and also friends and even work colleagues.

 

We discussed how a death in a family can lead to a roller coaster of emotions,  alongside the pressure to make important decisions,  so tempers may flare, hurtful things might be said and relationships even those that were once beautiful might suffer.

So if you are aware of this, you can deal with each other with more understanding. 

 

We shared a few tips on how to deal effectively with extended family members.

1. Understand that everyone is different and grieves differently. 
2. It is ok to have healthy boundaries 
3. Reaffirm your love 
4. If you have responsibilities and duties that you carried out for your extended family assign someone else to them
5. We encourage members of the extended family to seek help especially when they are struggling to recover from the loss themselves 
6. Remove yourself from feelings of guilt and blame. Do not accept any blame for loss, we talked about this in Episode 4
7. Talk talk talk, communication is key, talk to your loved ones about what is helpful, what is not, talk to them about their feelings if you can handle it, when you can’t talk we encourage you to keep a log in your diary or journal
8. Sadly, there would be hurts, misunderstandings and disputes, forgive, forgive forgive, apologise where it is necessary but seek to maintain cordial relationships with relatives 

We talked about experiencing disappointment in some of our friendships yet at the same time we discovered new friendships.

We explored some of the typical expressions of how grief changes friendships. We expressed that after a loss you are not the same person. Loss changes you and without friends who are empathetic and patient,  you would feel lonely and isolated.

 

We then discussed how you can stay friendly. We also shared tips for a friend to show support for a friend who has experienced loss:

1. Be empathetic
2. Don't ask them to call you if they need anything, truth is they won't. 
3. Communication is everything
4. When they do talk, listen, show up and offer them the gift of your presence
5. Love is an action word, show your love by doing
6. If you really want to be there for a friend, there are so many resources out there to help, ignorance is not an excuse,  you might not know what to say,  but you can learn.
7. Make an effort to check up on them, especially on anniversary,  holidays and celebrations. 
8. Share in their pain, and let it transform you. 

 

We hope you found great value in this episode.

 

We are available to help and support anyone who would require our help and you can reach us by sending us an email at 

hello@whenlifestops.org

 

For more information about us go to our website

 

http://whenlifestops.org

 

https://www.instagram.com/stellaagwor/

https://www.instagram.com/detolaamure/

 

Please share with anyone who is going through loss, like, comment and subscribe to our podcast on wherever you listen to your podcast. 

 

Keeping taking little steps every day that would move you forward and help you find new meaning to life.

 

Thank you for listening, till next week

 

Good bye.

Detola & Stella